Friday, February 13, 2009
February Transcripts
Bean: I had fun going to dinner with you and Daddy, Mum!
Me: We had fun too! You did a good job eating your spaghetti.
Bean: I like 'spetti! Just me and Mommy and Daddy. Maggie [the dog] can't come.
Me: That's right; Mags stayed home.
Bean: Her can't come. Her's too big to fit in a high chair!
Me: That's right! Also, there are no dogs allowed in the restaurant.
Bean: Yeah! 'Cause her would poop on the floor!
Transcript 2:
Me: Bean, Friday is pajama day at school!
Bean: OK, Mum! I bring my crib, too!
Transcript 3:
Bean: I want to grow up to be a mommy, just like you, Mum!
Me (truly touched): Oh, honey, that's so nice! You do?
Bean: Yeah. So I can have GUM!
And a few quotes:
I put the trash in the psycho bin for you, Mum!
I did not dream some dreams last night, Mum. I try again tonight.
I got egg seeds at the store with Daddy! To grow eggplants!
That's Madison, Mum. Her's a big kid. Her has ear wings!
I have a little tiny bum, Mum. You have a big bum!
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
Not so green Bean
- Please have pudding, Mum? No, Bean, you can't have pudding with your breakfast. Maybe after lunch. Please have lunch, Mum?
- No thank you Mum. I no want my peas. Please put them in the fridge? I save them for high school.
- Here, Daddy. These are for you!
- I want something else, Mum! Something.....good!
- Please have some cookies Mum? No, honey, you need to eat some more lunch. Would you like some strawberries? No thank you Mum. Please have some cookies? No. Please? I said 'Please,' Mum!
- OK, Bean, I see you're not eating your dinner. Are you full? Ready to get down? All done, Mummy! [I clear her tray.] Please have something else Mum? [She gets a huge smile on her face and whispers] Somethin' good!
Friday, January 23, 2009
Thursday, January 22, 2009
Dr. Bean, MD
Bean loves going to the doctor, and she constantly talks about her pediatrician. This comes in handy, kind of like Santa Claus, when we try to convince her to eat her vegetables or brush her teeth. "Dr. B. said big girls need to eat their peas..." Works like a charm. Sometimes.
Anyway, she recently started pretending to be Dr. B. I have a blood blister on my pinky that just won't go away. She has to be sure to "kiss my boo boo to make it feel better" at least twice a day, and yesterday she decided she would fix it once and for all - with her toy Craftsman drill. She also had to use the drill to take my "temp-asure" in my armpit, which of course required a lot of shirt-wrangling and contortion on my part. "You no have a fever, Mum. You don't need medicine." [Surely she was thinking, "More medicine for me!" - will post on that subject shortly.] Finally, the drill doubled as a "telescope" to listen to my heartbeat.
The healing-by-drill was a fun game, but I had to put the brakes on when she said, "You have a tummy ache, Mum. I make you feel better," as she lifted up my shirt and stabbed me in the stomach with a pencil. I did NOT see that one coming. I suggested that she focus her healing attention on her teddy bear. I'm sorry to say that if Boo Boo Bear didn't have a tummy ache before, he surely has one now.
My favorite Dr. Bean moment was when I was feeling blue a few days ago. She said, in her most tender voice, with a little hand on my cheek, "You are sad Mum? You want me to get you a band-aid?"
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
Monday, January 5, 2009
How to buy a better mouse trap?
- Spill ice cold soda on my lap on the way to Walmart. Try to walk quickly so other shoppers don't see my wet pants.
- Search the hardware / housewares section for 20 minutes before finding a Walmart employee who directs me to the grocery section. (Of course! How did I not know mouse traps would be with groceries?!)
- Select two packages of traps.
- Proceed to express lane.
- Wait in line for 15 minutes because the person ahead has at least 80 items in his cart (how did he miss the huge "EXPRESS LANE - 20 Items or Less" sign?) [Side rant: Is it really that difficult to use the correct "Fewer?"]
- Wait another two minutes while said express lane offender waits to hear his total before searching for his credit card and handing it to the cashier. [Is this your first time in a store buddy? Run it through the machine while you're being rung up....]
- Wait as traps are rung up; pay $4.23.
- Return to car to find that some one has parked his FJ Cruiser six inches from my driver's side door.
- Climb in over passenger seat and drive home.
- Smack hubby when he says, "Why didn't you just go to Home Depot?"
- Realize the day can only improve from here.
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Memorable Quotes
I know it's taboo to blog about not blogging, so I'll quickly apologize for my six month(!) hiatus, promise to post regularly, and then move on...
Bean is now 2 1/2 and VERY vocal. She is constantly asking what things are, who made them, where they went, and what their middle names are.
Every time I repeat her latest sound byte, I'm told "You should really write these down, or you'll forget them forever!" So, at last, I am doing so. These are just a few of the gems.
- Who made my bed, Mum? The people at the store, honey. But who made my bum, Mum?
- I don't want Santa to eat all my cookies, Mum!
- What's Santa's middle name? What's him's mom's name?
- Santa eats all those cookies so he can get STRRRROOOONNNGGGG!
- Where did Aunt M go? Her has a beard.
- I need my hat and minutes to go outside, Mum!
- I had NO nap, Grammy. Mommy is upSET!
- I had a good nap! Santa is happy! [TG for Santa!]
- Where's my hotdog's face go? I no like him.
- Santa lives at the Nerf Pole, Daddy!
- What's your dolly's name? Yogurt!
- What's your other dolly's name? Doctor!
- What's your boy doll's name? Princess!
- What would you like to ask Santa for? Fried dough!
- Wait your turn, Mum! [when I'm driving....]
- What she doed to you, Mum? [when I scold the dog]
- You doin' some emails on your 'puter?
- Why were you crying? I was cranky!
- I stick the flashlight in [the dog's] bum! Just pretend!
- My Daddy's middle name is Thomas! Thomas the Tank Engine!
- Just listen to the music, Mum. Take a deep breath. There. Now you feel better. [This from a two year old?!]
- I don't want to eat that. I can't like it, Daddy!
- Please have a delicious cookie, Mum?
- Please have something delicious to eat?
- Please have a snack? No, you need to eat your dinner. Please have pudding?!
- Look at that dude running! With NO PANTS! [jogger in ultra short shorts]
- Let's watch Glue's Clues! Let's watch Clifford the Red Big Dog!
- [Looking at digital photos] Let's just watch the video Dad!
- What do you think turkeys like to eat? Bugs! Lady bugs! And they have to wear them's sun hats and sun scream at the beach!
Everyone was right. I can't remember them all!
Thursday, June 5, 2008
Baby Bean
Bean loves looking at pictures, especially baby pictures - and most especially her OWN baby pictures. I have an album by my bed that she usually looks at while I'm getting dressed in the morning. She could look for hours, turning the pages calling out the names of the people in the photos.
Yesterday we were flipping through together, and I said, "Look how tiny you were! You started out very, very little, and you grew in Mommy's belly! Do you remember when you were very small, inside my belly?"
She crawled across the bed to where I was sitting and put her head against my stomach. "Back in? Back in, Mommy?"